The internet really does  makes getting up in the morning worthwhile.

Living up to the hype of the mid-90’s, every day on the internet brings new surprises and riches of immense proportion.

For instance, just today I won a $ 550,000 BMW. 

Imagine waking up to that !  It’s got to make your day, eh ?   All I have to do to claim it is reply to an email from the manager at BMW, who oddly enough, has a yahoo UK email address. You’d think a big company like BMW would at least give its employees a company email address.  Maybe they’re too busy giving away cars.

I’ve also been receiving a lot of great ecards from old friends and worshippers.  This is good because I thought my number of worshippers lately had dropped off but apparently not.  Just Good Karma I Guess.

There is a down side. 

I am constantly being warned about something important I have to do with bank accounts I didn’t even know I had.  I have a lot of bank accounts.  Probably because of all that money I’ve been getting on the internet.   

On the plus side, I have been approved for credit, by my rough calculation, to the sum of about 4,000,000 dollars just in the last couple of weeks alone.  That’ll come in handy as I tool around in my new BMW. 

Problem is, I haven’t had time to get any of these things sorted out, because I’ve just been too busy enlarging my penis.